The Random Button

“So… Doc. What was it that this button do?” I asked.

“It’s the randomizer button! It will make everything random!” said Dr. Malek, with his index finger dramatically pointing upward and swinging to and fro. His old face showed a sense of pride and achievement for his invention.

“Welp, beats me. How does that even work? Make everything random?” I asked yet again. The doctor seem to be pleased with his curious assistance; he fixed his glasses and gave out a speech that felt like it was a bit prepared.

“I initiated this project based on the latest Chaos theory publicized in Russia. They claim that there maybe a certain realm of pure properties entangled with our universe, which we may or may not alter. First, I used Kazahaki engine to identify and equally nullify the Gib constant. Can’t randomize anything with those keeping the reality-property index in check. And thus what I proposed afterward, which was rejected…”

Hmm. There he goes with his usual long-winded explications that lost many other apprentices. While he was busy drowning me in his arcane jargon and gibberish tech-talk, I simply pressed the button while he wasn’t looking. Experience comes before lectures for me. Beep!


As soon as I pressed the button, I found myself naked, and also having a sexual intercourse with a beautiful girl wearing a glass. It seemed like we were already deep into the sex, as the girl was moaning like a Japanese porn star.

“Oh, holy shit! I’m so sorry. I was… uh…” I apologized and then mumbled. What do I say to this girl I just lost my virginity to? Well, I pressed some weird invention of this ol’ doc and then I don’t remember why we were having sex? Damn. I was having a mild panic.

“You fool!” said the girl, “I haven’t finished explaining how it precisely works!” The tone of the voice was precisely like that of Dr. Malek. Oh no… “Yes, it’s me! Your professor. Stop fucking me and listen to me! At least, try stop yourself from humping me.”

At first I was shocked I was fucking my professor, but then again, I was further surprised to realize that I can’t stop thrusting my penis into her new vagina. I really tried to stop, but I couldn’t! Not that I desired her so much as in love, but I was physically unable to stop myself from moving. I was moving against my will!

Who appeared to be feminized Dr. Malek observed me and said, “Hmm, seems like your traits have been randomized into that of a sex maniac! Damn!” Dr. Malek, on the other hand, couldn’t stop her new self from moaning with each thrust. I felt helpless as this random sex was going on.

“Quick! We don’t have much time! Find the randomizer button! It has Undo function! Find it!” she shouted, while shaking her legs with feminine orgasm. I looked around and found the button just at reach of my arm. Thankfully I was able to move my arm. It was just my penis that couldn’t stop itself.

“What do I do with this?” I asked.

“Firmly press it and don’t let it go until everything returns to normal! Randomizing gets permanent only after several minutes!” She answered. Huh. I immediately pressed the button with my hands. I was able to control myself–apparently my randomized trait has been returned to normal. However she hasn’t returned to the old man I knew she once was.

Perhaps by my random thought, I wondered what would happen if I were let go of the button right now. And experiment before planning, that’s me.

“You fool! You unrandomized only yourself! I’m still a girl, can’t you see?” She shouted. Oh, I know. I know. That’s why I precisely stopped pressing the button.


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