Tactile Gif II: MVII.gif

For music it was Beethoven, for painting it was Picasso, for tactile gifs it was Meredith Velasquez.

She liked to say she wasn’t even the prettiest girl in her high school graduating class, but her orgasms were pure art. She became the most well known porn star in the world within months of appearing in her first tactile gif. As soon as they hooked her up to the tactile recorder, the director of The Siesmix Corporation knew they had struck gold.

Mary knew just when to start and stop the neural feed, giving us all sweet, titillating snapshots of her/our blood rushing from her/our face, feeling the chill in her/our toes, the lightheadedness as she/we reach the very edge of an atomic orgasm and then making us all climb back down into the unbearable ecstasy of an orgasmic buildup.

Using a USB 10 cable–or a USB 9 at that time, actually–anyone with a neural uplink could take a looping ride in Mary’s body night or day. This gif we’re looking at now, MVII.gif, is particularly well known. You could almost say it’s historic.

It is more stripped down than the baroque reverse-orgasm cutups she assembled in her late career, but this one made and almost ruined her career. When this was first released, the Seismos.com voting system immediately sent it to the top of the ‘Best’ page. Both men and women around the country found themselves unable to resist riding it around and around for hours. In fact, it became so popular that “hooking up with Mary” became a synonym for enjoying the new tactile gif media format that was rapidly replacing masturbation as the most popular way to get off.

People would post funny videos on youtube of the first time they experienced this particular gif. Men and women tried it out and made videos of themselves writhing on the floor, knocking over furniture, and fighting people when they began trying to unjack them from the gif. It was a pop culture hit and, to many religious types, the most recent sign of the apocalypse. Then things turned dark.

People began discovering their roommates and significant others dead in front of their keyboards with this gif still loaded. It seemed that Mary’s orgasm was too powerful for many to handle more than around 20 loops in a row. Others became addicted to Mary’s amazing orgasms. Some became depressed that their own bodies could not generate the same level of pleasure as they experienced online and had to visit psychiatric hospitals after making strange calls to their parents. Soon the government banned it and implemented an entire new list of standards for the creation of safer tactile gifs.

So yes, this was hard to find. It involved leaving money at a rock quarry and getting a flash drive from a man in a trench coat behind a Target. Nonetheless, here it is. Now if you babysit me while I ride it around, I’ll let you be the next to feel some history.


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